Good sex is no guarantor of compatibility for a couple who are not married, and it is no proof of commitment or fidelity for those who are married. Too many times the sex act is misinterpreted or given undeserved prominence in both dating and marriage.

Because sex is such a powerful physical and emotional expression, it is often employed or interpreted, either consciously or unconsciously, to be the substance or benchmark of a meaningful interpersonal relationship between a man and a woman.

When sexual intercourse is understood properly, it becomes a marital gift intended to build intimacy and reaffirm genuine feelings between spouses. It reaffirms feelings of safety, truthfulness, desirability, vulnerability, affection, value, compatibility, and commitment. This intimate expression can be a powerful reinforcement of the covenant of marriage. Where this is not the case, the act of sexual intercourse is little more than a loyalty test, or an act performed to control, to pleasure, or to exploit.

Simply, sex can be fickle. It can be inconsistent or great or difficult. What is most important for each spouse to understand is that sex is just one part of a larger whole. It is an aspect of marriage that can bring either great joy or significant challenges.

Too many times the sex act is misinterpreted or given undeserved prominence in both dating and marriage.

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Some things to do for the week

Day 2: Reflect on the message and scripture reading; journal if you like
Day 3: Pray for or meditate on what you think you need
Day 4: Discuss the message and scripture with your spouse
Day 5: Plan how you can best respond to the message
Day 6: Rest; don’t think about the message or the scripture; listen in the stillness
Day 7: Recommit yourself to your marriage

Applicable scripture listed under Discussion References.