Have you ever observed a couple and wondered why their marriage appears to be so easy and happy and peaceful?
It’s true that in some marriages there is a natural rhythm and harmony that radiates from the relationship and makes the marriage shine internally and externally. But what is the secret to these marriages? Is it because the partners are just “compatible”? How do these couples make it look so easy? Maybe the answer lies with the fact that couples entering into marriage with some basic relational knowledge (and tools) for how to build a peaceful and joyful marriage get off to a better start.
No matter what path a married couple takes to reach harmony in their relationship, there’s no question that marriage requires a high level of mutual awareness and active participation by each partner. It’s like being in a musical band. If you want your marriage to produce harmony, each member of the ensemble has to know, practice, and play the notes that will make beautiful music.
One characteristic of easier marriages is a commitment to be honest. When you commit to being honest, it allows you and your spouse to live in the reality of your circumstances. Being honest provides the foundation for trust. Honesty provides consistency; consistency provides stability; stability breeds confidence; confidence creates peace.
Another defining characteristic of easier marriages is humility. When you practice humility, it allows for you to acknowledge your flaws and understand how those flaws impact your partner. Practicing humility also equips you to make any personal changes that are necessary to strengthen your marriage. Humility never demands a winner or a loser. Rather, it demands that
you confront yourself and your spouse in truth—which when experienced, leads to healing, harmony and happiness.
No matter what path a married couple takes to reach harmony in their relationship, there’s no question that marriage requires a high level of mutual awareness and active participation by each partner.